Mom to Mom:
my small victories, struggles and advice on the day to day.
I started this blog space on the internet so I can share with you my personal Motherhood journey - and how my relationship with that journey became so much more meaningful and joyful when I was fully rested. I’m passionate about all things that bring a sense of harmony and calm into parenting. On this little blog, I hope to share those things with you - from healthy recipes for you or your baby, sleep training advice, self-care practices and so much more.Parenthood is not easy which is why I want to encourage you by sharing what works for me and my family on a daily basis :)
EFFECTIVELY UTILIZE YOUR VILLAGE: TIPS ON ASKING FOR HELP
Written by Diana Martins
When you are an independent person, asking for help can make you feel vulnerable and dependent. When I became a mom help wasn’t a luxury but a necessity. My baby was high needs and my post partum recovery was slow and a shock to my system. I thought I would share what worked best for me in asking for help.
1. Let go of the need to be in control in order to ACCEPT help and be SPECIFIC about what you need done. For example, I asked for meals but I was very specific in what dishes to bring. I liked quick wraps or chicken cutlets I could eat with one hand. Soup was definitely not what I wanted to sit down and eat – especially over a baby.
2. Save tasks that can be outsourced. Baby’s laundry is endless and tedious. You might be able to go 3-4 days in between doing baby’s laundry and save it for when you have an extra pair of hands. Be specific about the laundry in terms of what detergent, hang or dry as well as putting it away. I don’t fold my swaddle blankets but prefer them rolled up and I was sure to tell the person helping just those quick instructions. Afterall, if I have to unfold and refold then it’s not much help for me.
3. Schedule your help. You don’t need your home flooded with people and empty hands. Let your support tribe know that you are OK for help this week but would really appreciate their time the following week. My husband took the first week off and I had my mom take the following week off. There was no point in having two people at the same time when I really just needed one person.
4. Don’t feel guilty for needing help. You are being too hard on yourself! I remember hating the feeling of being dependent on others. It’s because motherhood is hard and newborns literally need 24/7 care. There will come a day where you realize that it’s gotten easier and you got through a day on your own, with just you and your babe.
I hope my tips will give you food for thought and help you with your postpartum and beyond.
Diana Martins
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